A Gyno's Guide to Boosting Your Libido

By Evelyn Minaya, MD, OB/GYN Vice President of Women Caring for Women

A Gyno's Guide to Boosting Your Libido

Every day, I encounter questions about sexual libido in my clinical practice. As with most things, there are no easy solutions to such complex problem. I believe that libido has to be addressed from two angles: the physical and the mental. 

First, I address any physical problems. The most common complaint that I get from my patients is painful sex. This presents a vicious circle in that the more pain the woman experiences, the less of a desire she has to have intercourse. No one wants to be uncomfortable, especially with something that supposed to feel good. The three most common causes of painful sex are vaginal dryness (not unique to post-menopausal women), vaginal atrophy as a consequence of vaginal dryness, and lack of lubrication that has “staying power.” Your doctor should be able to address these issues.


A thorough examination should be done, including blood work to rule out any metabolic causes. Thyroid disease, especially, can lead to vaginal dryness. You should specifically address where you experience pain with intercourse. Different locations of pain can be caused by different reasons. You should also be tested for any sexually transmitted infections because they can cause painful sex. Your physician can prescribe hormonal (estrogen cream) or non-hormonal remedies (olive oil). You should always use lubrication during intercourse, even if you feel moist.

Secondly, I address any medication the patient might be taking. Certain medications like birth control pills, anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, and thyroid medications can affect sexual libido. Men can also experience a decrease in libido with anti-hypertensive medication. You can check with your physician to see if you could change the prescription or maybe the strength.

There are no FDA-approved drugs for increasing libido today. Hormonal replacement therapy (HRT) is only approved for hot flashes – not to increase libido. However, while women who undergo HRT feel better, it does not necessarily increase their desire to have sex. There are some compounding pharmacies that make testosterone (male hormones) as a cream to improve sexual libido. Studies have shown that testosterone can work for about three months but can loose its efficacy after this period. Long-term use of the drug can increase your cholesterol, increase male-pattern hair growth, and increase clitoral size. For more on hormone replacement therapy, click here. 

Lastly, I address the relationship. Couples in long-term relationships tend to fall into a routine. Sex takes a back seat to jobs, children, illnesses, parents and stress. As I tell my patients, 95% of libido is in your head, the other five is “down there.”

If you are not happy, stressed, or having financial difficulties – your libido will suffer. My solution? Communicate and express how you feel. Your partner is not a mind reader and open dialogue is good. Changing your lifestyle and making the time is important. I know it is easier said than done but putting your mind to it could possibly save your relationship. Sex is not only an integral part of any relationship but it also is healthy for you. Studies have shown that it decreases heart disease, stress, and burns off calories. Most importantly, it makes you feel satisfied, sexy and happy. Make it happen!

Your Parent Has Dementia: What to Talk to Their Doctor About

Make sure all their doctors are aware of all the medications she is taking.

Q: My mom is 94 and has dementia. She is taking a whole medicine cabinet-full of medications and I think they actually make her fuzzier. How should I talk to her various doctors about what she is taking and if she can get off some of the meds? — Gary R., Denver, Colorado

A: Many dementia patients are taking what docs call a "polypharmacy" — three or more medications that affect their central nervous system. And we really don't know how that mixture truly affects each individual person.

A new study in JAMA Network that looked at more than 1 million Medicare patients found almost 14% of them were taking a potentially harmful mix of antidepressants, antipsychotics, antiepileptics, benzodiazepines such as Valium and Ativan, nonbenzodiazepine benzodiazepine receptor agonist hypnotics such as Ambien or Sonata, and opioids. And almost a third of those folks were taking five or more such medications. The most common medication combination included an antidepressant, an antiepileptic, and an antipsychotic. Gabapentin was the most common medication — often for off-label uses, such as to ease chronic pain or treat psychiatric disorders, according to the researchers from the University of Michigan.

Keep Reading Show less